About Widow

Large Handbag Collector. Obscenely Expensive Shoe & Handbag Lover. Blonde. Redhead. Brunette. Breastfeeder. Pug-fox terrier belly scratcher. Drunken Break Dancer. Bartender of the stars. Semi Conscious Writer. Earth loving. Tori Amos Listening. Loud Mouth. Chef Loving Lady...

Can you say Christmas Card?

You know that feeling you get when you get pulled over by the cops?  Times that by one million and then you will be in my shoes about an hour ago.  I got home from work (that sounds so funny) and decided that the kids and I were going to take advantage of the lovely afternoon with a trip to the jungle aka Metroparks.  We packed up and soon arrived at the beautiful forest.  I put Louisiana in the backpack and we headed out.  After about 5 seconds Biggie wanted to walk so I let her.  There was no one else on the trail.  We did about a ten minute hike and headed back down.  We picked up rocks, splashed in puddles, and tried to climb trees.  It was grand.  About 10′ before we hit the car I noticed that I couldn’t hear Louisiana.  She had been right on the side of me and Catcher had been in front.  I called out for her and she didn’t answer.  At that split second I noticed a man staring at me from his car.  My mind went WILD with crazy scenarios.  I screamed her name and begged Catcher to help me find her.  Still no answer.  I ran back into the woods paralyzed in fear.  There was no one in the woods while we were but being the horror movie junkie that I am nothing seemed impossible.  My screams got louder and the asshole in the car just stared.  Finally I spied her Dalmatian coat peeking out from behind a tree.  I ran as fast as I could and there she was.  Crouching down, smiling and not saying a damn word.

Holy hell.

My heart felt like Andre the Giant was standing on it.  I hugged baby girl with all my might and headed home.  Another day in the life.

Yes that IS a pomme fritte hanging out of Biggie’s mouth

See those TWO empty plates, my big man polished off some duck rillette, green beans, burger w/ raclette, buckwheat pasta, and some good ‘ol buttered noodles that the kitchen sent out.

It seems as though my husband has a fan.  Or 2.

I am desperately trying to figure out summer camp for the boy.  It seems as though I am a bit late and everything is full.  Bad mommy.  Any suggestions of camps or classes would be gratly appreciated!

Last week while we were celebrating the opening of our restaurant another family across the country was suffereing a tragic loss.  A family that I don’t know.  A mother that I have never met.  My schedule was hectic last week and my time spent perusing the interwebs was quite limited.  But it was hard to avoid the story.  As soon I read the words “It breaks my heart to have to share this news with you, but sweet, beautiful Maddie passed away today, ” my heart shattered into a million pieces.  The thought of losing a child is something that lingers in the back of every parents mind.  Everytime I leave my children in the care of someone else, a flash of what if’ scenarios scroll across my brain like a lightening storm.  

Maddie’s story was streamed worldwide through bloggers & tweeters.  The support is outpouring and it is hard not to feel affected by this little girls sudden & unexpected death. I had never read Maddie’s mom’s blog.  I did not follow her on Twitter.  But I read other’s who were devestated by her death.  People I followed on Twitter turned their icon’s purple for Maddie.  I clicked on links that took me to sites rasing money for her family & for the charity that she and her family had supported.  Maddie’s face on blogs everywhere.  News stories about the blogger whose child died.  

And then today the interwebs broke news of  yet another child whose life was taken.  From another blogger.  Another mother.  A family I did not know.  My eyes became wet as I read the equally sad story of Thalon.   

I have no sage wisdom regarding the death of a child.  I have no experience.  I pray that I never will.

The collective support of both of the children has taught me that our world is a world connected and we do not have to experience pain and tragedy alone.  We can hold hands, virtually or flesh on flesh.  Mothers can understand the pain that other mothers are going through even if they have never met.  A child can be remembered forever by someone she had never even looked  smiled at.

I don’t know what to say to these families.  I don’t know how my words could even make a dent in what they are feeling.  I just know that I am sad.  I am sad at the unfairness of it all.  I am sad that some mother will never get to see her daughter at 13.  A father will never get to play catch with his son.  I just hope that the amazing support of Maddie and Thalon  bring even just a nanosecond of light to these dark times.

I send you all my love to you, Maddie and Thalon.  xoxo

 

 

 

 

Our day began at the amazing St. John’s Cathedral

Louisiana found that she loved flowers, to smell…and to eat.  Who would have ever thought that Biggie Smalls could be this angelic.  And in a church no less.

Church lasted about five minutes and then Catcher decided that he must worship outside, while Lou felt that her prayers would be better heard if she was lying on the ground.

After mass we headed down to the restaurant for some brunch made by the Chef’s mamma.  Yummers!

The kids searched long and hard for their baskets and eventually found them!  Needless to say they were pleased.  

But not as pleased as when they met the infamous Easter Bunny.

 

Easter Candy & Passover Matzo to You All!  xoxo

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