Once upon a time there was a Chef. He was a passionate Chef who loved to use his surroundings as inspiration for his culinary creations. His passion for local could be seen in every dish that left his kitchen. He believed the closer he was to the farm, the better his food would be. His passion didn't discriminate. He loved the farm but he also loved to look for edibles in the woods. In the spring time his passion would take him to the beautiful emerald necklace in search of wild onions and greens. He would christen his spring dishes inspired by the forest's bounty. He would also bring his mushroom guide and keep his eyes open for morels, a favorite of his in the spore family.
The Chef's all knowing wife would warn him against this quest that he held so close to his heat. She would remind him again and again that he was in fact, NOT a Mycologist. Because of their love, he would kept the mushroom hunting to identification only. He knew the dangers of the forest as well as it's bounty. His love of the shroom would never entice him to the point of no return. He would always show foraging restraint.
That is until he thought he found wild chanterelles....
A teaspoon of shroom and two hours later, the foraging Chef found himself in the hospital, puking. his. guts. out. FALSE Chanterelles had done him in.
Hygrophoropsis aurantiaca, commonly known as the False Chanterelle, is an orange funnel-shaped mushroom which has been confused at times with the true chanterelles. The difference between the two in identification is a tiny black dot in the center of the cap.
Moral of the story:
Always listen to your wife. She is ALWAYS RIGHT. And if the mushroom has a damn black dot on it, STAY THE EFF AWAY!!!
I jest about my Chef's idiocracy but I do highly warn about the dangers of thinking you are an actual mycologist. Since this happened, over 20 people have filled me in on their own dangerous mushroom stories, some with an ending not as pretty as ours. So... if it grows on the ground and it's in the spore family, keep on walking yo.
Has your friend, family, or sig oth done anything this stupid? Tell me their story in the comments section and you could win a gift certificate for a pair of Gap jeans. Any kind you like...
Best story wins on Friday September 10th.