34 Things I've Learned in 34 Years

I turned 34 on Saturday. Ho-Hum.

Celebrating 34 with my ladies!

I guess I'm a thirtysomething now.  

As I pondered the crows feet quickly forming around my eyes I began to think of my life's  moments passed. I have no doubt lived a very full life. Wrong turns, mistakes made, love found and love lost have made up the majority of my years, and I wouldn't change a moment. 

This is what I have learned. 

1. Labor is ONE MILLION GAZILLION times worth it.  

2. Falling in love happens over time. It took me 15 years to fall in love with the Chef and everyday I fall just a little bit more.

3. That being said, Ben Affleck was right. Love is work. It is like having a second job, well really like a third if you have any mini's.

4. Adopting a dog from Tompkins Square Park while my 'roomate' (aka Chef) was out of town was one of the best non sober decisions I have ever made. 

5. Algebra is a scam.  Haven't done it since college and don't plan to anytime soon. 

6. Kurt Vonnegut books get better and better after each re-read. There is always some other hidden quark or lesson that I missed the time I read before.  

7. Talking to my dad on the phone everyday has become an important staple and stabilizer in my life. I'm lucky to do so.  

8. Drugs are bad. 

9. On that note, heroin is the devil. Watching heroin addiction unfold and destroy is the worst pain my family has ever encountered. 

10. Being married to a Chef doesn't mean I eat well every night. It does mean that I usually fall asleep to reruns of Law & Order. 

11. On the plus side, being married to a Chef, a great Chef at that, means I get to be inspired by food, love, and art on a daily basis.  

12. Owning a restaurant is so fucking hard. 

13. Owning a restaurant does not mean we are gazillioners. Far, far from it in fact. Nobody opens a restaurant to get rich and if they do their food is probably shitty. 

14.  The majority of "farm to table, local, fresh" restaurants I have been to are not very truthful or transparent regarding their "farm to table" ingredients. 

15. Meeting my celebrity crush was not as big of deal as I thought it would be. 

16. Vinegar is seriously the end all miracle liquid. From washing vegetables to hair detangling, it's the jam.  

17. Giving up fast food six years ago was one of the best choices I have ever made.  

18. Giving up drugs was also another good choice.  

19. Opening multiple credit cards at 18 is never a good idea. 

20. Business has a way of shining light on the greedy mother fuckers around you.  

21. Having a nervous breakdown and chopping off your hair is a much simpler medication than prozac. 

22. High school brought me together with women I will know and love for the rest of my life. That's about the only thing though. 

23. My grandma's death was devastating to me however I would have never moved to Manhattan to live with my friend Jonathon, had it not happened.  

24. Traveling makes me happy to the core.

25. Manhattan is a second home to me. Someday, when the minis are done with school, I will move back. I will live in Brooklyn and I will paint. 

26. I would also like to retire in New Orleans. Preferably in the swamp where I can sit on my porch barefoot, listen to Joni Mitchell, and smoke funky cigarettes.  

27. I shouldn't have gone to college. I am much more of a life experience type of person. 

28. My stepmom turned out to be kinda awesome. It only took me 13 years to realize that but I'm glad I did. 

29. I am really loud, really honest, fiercely independent and a bit insane. I used to think these were faults. Now I know different.  

30. To me, the Earth is the most important gift our civilization has ever been given. Hopefully we will start taking care of it.  

31. I love aperol spritz.

32. My body is squishy and I'm ok with that. Would I prefer abs? Sure. But do I get grossed out when I look at myself. Not in a second.  

33. Sometimes the things you think you would never want (in my case kids and a husband) are the things that you always needed. 

34. Money, houses, cars, Louis Vuitton handbags, sofas, clothes are all just things. Things that none of us really need. Live each day like everything you own could disappear with a snap of the finger. I guarantee you will find happiness. Allowing myself to stop giving a shit about all the "stuff" was the moment I truly understood what true happiness is.